A guide to deconditioning
I was on a client call the other day, with someone who reminded me a lot of myself when I was first learning about human design.
She knew she was out of alignment in a lot of areas in her life, because she had been conditioned to act against her natural energy and design.
The problem was, she didn’t know how to change it.
My personal deconditioning journey
I’ve been there too, which made me feel like this is a topic that needed to be discussed further.
When I was first learning about my design, parts of it didn’t resonate with me at all, because I had been living so out of alignment for years and years. The perfectionist in me wanted to know exactly how to “decondition” so I could get on with things. A checklist, if you will, where if you do this, you’ll suddenly be deconditioned and able to live as you were naturally designed.
What is deconditioning?
Unfortunately, the path to decondition isn’t quite so linear. It’s a lifelong journey, but there are things you can do to help the process along.
First, let’s start with what exactly deconditioning is: deconditioning is the conscious process of changing our thoughts (values, beliefs, morals), emotions, and behaviors to be more aligned with who we really are (our human design).
From the moment we’re born, we start to be conditioned by the people around us – family, friends, society, culture – to create beliefs, values, pressures and fears that go against who we authentically are at our core.
So to get back to this, we need to first know where we’re out of alignment (I dive deep into this in all of my Soul Map Blueprints ) and then consciously choose to change our current beliefs.
Five tips to begin your deconditioning journey:
1.Practice living your strategy and authority:
If you’ve spent any time learning about human design, you’ve likely heard this before – that’s because it’s THE most important way to start living how you’re naturally designed. If you do nothing else in your human design journey, this is the best place to start. Learn how it feels in your body to know when a decision is right or wrong for you (your authority) and practice learning when the timing is correct for you to move forward (your strategy).
2. Spend time every day being alone in your own energy:
This is important, because our open or undefined centers in our chart are constantly picking up energy from other people. To get closer to who we naturally are, we need to get used to being in our own energy – without distractions! Some ideas of what this could look like:
- A walk by yourself, in nature if possible (very grounding). Keep your headphones out and use all five senses to pay attention to what’s going on around you
- Meditating
- Breathwork
- Exercise
- Journaling
- A calming bath
3. Connect to your inner child:
One of my favourite deconditiong tools has been taking myself on an “inner child” date. This involves thinking back to who you were as a child – what did you love to do? What did you find super fun and freeing? What are some of your happiest memories from childhood? Children are the purest, most natural versions of themselves, because the conditioning we experience as adults hasn’t had time to build up yet.
As a child, I used to love creating stories, drawing pictures, and making little books out of cardboard and printer paper – so that’s something I’ve done to reconnect to that little girl. It might feel silly at first, but I can guarantee if you spend some time doing something you loved as a child, you’ll feel lighter after, and it will bring you closer to who you naturally are at your core.
4. Dive deeper into your limiting beliefs by doing subconscious reprogramming work:
Most of the limiting beliefs we hold end up being at a subconscious level – meaning we might not even be aware we hold them. If unaddressed, they can continue to hold you back from living as your natural self, which in turn holds you back in life and business. To work through these, you may want to consider taking a course, or working with a coach or a therapist.
5. Change your daily habits:
Part of deconditioning is noticing what is taking us away from who we are at our core. For example, if you’re a projector with a jam-packed schedule and zero flexibility, you likely are feeling drained and burned out a lot of the time. Getting back to your natural self means you need to change what your day-to-day looks like. As a projector, this might mean leaving more space in your days for rest and simply slowing down.
Recognizing your not-self theme
As you start your deconditiong journey, you’ll want to pay attention to the areas in your chart where you are out of alignment, and when you are experiencing your “not-self” theme. This is a feeling you have when you feel like you’re forcing things and there is a better way to do things. For projectors, it’s bitterness, generators and manifesting generators is frustration, manifestors anger, and reflectors disappointment.
While doing this work may not be the most comfortable experience, it will help you get closer to living as you’re naturally designed – which will help make everything in your life feel easier.
If you’d like to learn more about your unique human design and where you might be in or out of alignment currently, grab your Soul Map Blueprint (personal or business) to dive deeper into who you’re meant to be at your core. I would be honoured to support you in your deconditioning journey.